In Memory of Warmer Summers

Newton, KS to Sterling, KS

Friendly horn taps:

Miles: 64

Total so far: 2,240

Kansas today

Beauty break

We are settling into a rhythm of early starts to minimize the effects of the heat and the wind.  Things have settled some for us and we may not be defeated quite yet, though at times it may look like it.  Today for instance, I laid down on the concrete pool deck without the benefit of a lounge chair at the Sterling Municipal Pool and went fast asleep while small, wet children scrambled all around me heading back to the diving board to repeat their cannonball acts.

We’ve had some tough days.  There were a few days in Missouri where the narrow, winding, shoulder-less roads, steep hills, and rude impatient drivers combined for some long nerve wracking and exhausting days.  When I thought it impossible to relax, when my nerves were on edge and my legs wanted to give out, I thought of the others who for 35 years have ridden these same roads, and found comfort in their successes.

In the painfully long, enduring road I’ve traveled with my grief, it is not too much different.  The fact that others have traveled similar roads and survived is vital.  I will never forget a  Compassionate Friends Conference (a group that supports parents after a child dies) when, in one workshop, a newly bereaved woman broke down and went on a rant expressively giving voice to all the pain she was going through, the grief spasms that seized her, the uncontrolled pain, crying, and otherworldliness she was feeling, and finally, she accused everyone in the room of some sort of insanity because she had observed people laughing, enjoying friendships, seemingly going about life “normally” when she was absolutely convinced she was losing her mind from her knife-edged grief.

The presenter, a kind and insightful bereaved father and Episcopal priest, asked everyone in the room to stand.  Then he asked those standing to sit down if they had not experienced uncontrolled spasms of grief.  He asked those who have not experienced knife-edged pain, to sit down, and did the same for those who’ve never experienced the “otherworldliness” feelings of no longer belonging to the rest of the world.  When he was done, he asked the woman to look around the room.  There were about 200 people standing.  No one was seated.

He explained that we were not only standing because we experienced the same things, but were standing also in support of her.  It was an impressive moment.

Mothers Against Drunk Driving serves the same purpose.  Last year, MADD turned 30, yet our organization’s heart and soul remains intact.  We give victims a voice and a place where your loved ones will be honored.

Keep moving forward...

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Tomorrow’s ride is dedicated to Travis James Dreiling

Travis James Dreiling

Travis James Dreiling’s hometown is Hutchinson, Kansas, not far from here.  He was killed at the age of 26 on November 26, 2005 by a drunk driver.  He was expecting his first child.